Coburg Banks | Multi-sector UK recruitment agency

20 Christmas Party Horror Stories

By St. Nick (Mark Wilkinson) | Dec 10, 2015 | Friday Funnies

I wrote a post the other day called ‘What NOT to Do at the Office Christmas Party.’

It revealed the 7 most-hated (yet most common) social etiquette fails that people across the UK make, year after year.

people from The Office dancing
A few people came back to me with the same response – “this is common sense” and “surely no one would actually do this, would they?”

But, my friends, there’s no smoke without fire (this HR Magazine blog post reassured me of that)…

So, this week, I’ve been investigating the World Wide Web, chatting to my fellow consultants and interrogating my friends and family to find out their worst Office Christmas party experiences.

And here are 20 of the best!

Bosses Behaving Badly

Think you’ve got a horrible boss? You ain’t seen nothing yet!

Creepy man stood under the mistletoe, putting a mint in his mouthChristmas Party 1. The management team who forced their employees to take turns doing “karaoke,” completely a cappella, when no one would volunteer.

Christmas Party 2. The manager who took his staff out for a 3-course Christmas meal and ‘had an emergency’ when desert arrived, leaving his team to pick up the bill.

Christmas Party 3. The manager who made her PA go home and change because she had the same dress on as her (she must have looked better in it!)

Christmas Party 4. The boss who got caught by his wife, telling an employee ‘oh no, I’m not married’ (she was stood behind him the entire time).

Christmas Party 5. The boss who kissed the new (20 years younger) apprentice in front of everyone.

When the alcohol’s a-flowing…

woman saying 'just get me vodka'Rule number 1 of any work event: don’t drink too much!

Christmas Party 6. The poor CEO whose wife turned up “sozzled,” fell off a chair, ranted at anyone who tried to help her and then had to be carried to bed – in front of all of the clients.

Christmas Party 7. The poor soul who fell asleep in a toilet cubicle and then woke up to find that the entire restaurant was empty and he was locked in.

Christmas Party 8. The PA who, at a karaoke party, grabbed the mic and went on a 10-minute rant about how she’d been sleeping with the boss and was sick of lying to his wife – who stood watching from the bar.

Christmas Party 9. The employee who’d had enough, so called himself an ambulance for ‘being too drunk.’

Christmas Party 10. The manager who pinched everyone else’s alcoholic beverage tokens and got so drunk he proceeded to perform Lord of the Dance.

A little too revealing…

There is ALWAYS one…

businessman with naked legs outChristmas Party 11. The Scottish programmer who, when irritated with a colleague, decided that the best way to deal with his feelings was to pull up his kilt and place it (the kilt!) on her shoulder.

Christmas Party 12. The poor employee who decided that attempting to give her boss a strip tease was a good idea.

Christmas Party 13. The poor employee who (in a game of truth and dare) got dared to run around the office building naked, at which point his colleagues locked him outside. He was completely sober.

Christmas Party 14. The poor employee who arrived dressed up as a Christmas tree… the inner (clearly cheap material) bodycon layer of her outfit split and she revealed pretty much everything to everyone.

Christmas Party 15. The naughty employees who were caught ‘getting intimate’ in the boss’s car. (Don’t ask me how they got in there!)

Well that didn’t quite go to plan…

These lot probably had great intentions – let’s liven up the atmosphere a bit – unfortunately they seem to have missed the mark just a little bit.

kids trying to do the tablecloth trick but breaking everything insteadChristmas Party 16. The employee who tried to photocopy his bum, but managed to smash the glass in the process. He ended up in hospital with shards of glass sticking out of his rear end.

Christmas Party 17. The employee who attempted to do the “pulling the tablecloth from beneath the glasses” trick, but ended up smashing all of them and spraying wine all over everyone.

Christmas Party 18. The poor Director who made a big show of proposing to his girlfriend in front of everyone… she said no, confessing that she’d been having a 6-month long affair with his Co-Director.

Christmas Party 19. The employee who showed up completely sober but out of breath and drenched in sweat… within minutes, 3 policemen showed up and arrested him for causing a public disturbance.

Christmas Party 20. The love-struck employee who serenaded his office crush… unfortunately her boyfriend, who was present, didn’t take it very well! A fight erupted and both ended up in cells for the night.

Got your own horror stories?

We’d love to hear some of the weird, wonderful and completely inappropriate things that you’ve seen (or even done) at the office Christmas party!

It just seems to be one of those events, that attracts drunkenness and debauchery.

Recruiter Pro Tip

There is a message in the madness: be careful at the office Christmas party and always keep in mind that you’re in a professional setting.

Philandering with colleagues, badmouthing the boss and getting absolutely sloshed, really are no-nos – is it worth the risk?

They may seem like a great idea at the time, but you don’t want to wake up the next day with that morning-after-the-night-before doom and regret!

If you’d like us to send over some more of our festive funnies, click here to subscribe to this blog!

Want to read more funny Christmas party horror stories?

These great articles should keep you occupied…

Happy Friday!

- St. Nick (Mark Wilkinson)
Mark as Saint Nick!

St. Nick (Mark Wilkinson)

Mark is one of the founders of Coburg Banks and heads up the permanent recruitment division of the business.  Every day he helps companies with their recruitment projects, sourcing the very best individuals for their vacancies.  He understands recruitment inside-out.

> More blog posts by St. Nick (Mark Wilkinson)

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