Hello, it's me.
This week I've been rekindling my love for music.
And while I was listening to the soothing tones of Adele, I realised something. "This song could be about recruiters."
So I decided to do something a bit silly, this week. I've come up with 11 other songs (1 = Adele) that could reflect conversations between recruiters and candidates.
Maybe a few are a tad far fetched... but I hope you enjoy them!
1. Hello - Adele
Recruiter: Hello, it's me
Candidate: Hi.
Recruiter: I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to meet
Candidate: Why? The last time we spoke you pulled my interview.
Recruiter: To go over everything….
2. Take On Me - A-ha
Recruiter: I just don’t think you’re the right sort of person they’re looking for in this role…
Candidate: Take on me…
Recruiter: No… Honestly your CV just doesn’t match up to the job spec…
Candidate: Take me on…
Recruiter: Really, it’s not going to happen. If you give me a few days I can look at our other roles which may be suitable.
Candidate: I’ll be gone, in a day or two.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djV11Xbc914
3. I Feel Good - James Brown
Recruiter: So, they’d like to offer you the job, what do you think?
Candidate: Brilliant! I accept the offer.
Recruiter: Okay, I’ll let them know – congratulations again.
-End of call-
Recruiter: I feel good! I knew that I would.
4. Too Good At Goodbyes - Sam Smith
Candidate: Sorry about cancelling before… Would I still be able to attend the interview?
Recruiter: I’m just not sure… Every time you walk out, the less I love you.
Candidate: *Ignoring the weird “I love you”* Okay but I’m available immediately.
Recruiter: Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true.
Candidate: …Did you just call me baby? What’s wrong with you?
Recruiter: I’m way too good at goodbyes. *Hangs up*
5. Human - Rag 'n'Bone Man
Candidate: Look, I really need this job; can you get me an interview?
Recruiter: Some people got the real problems, some people out of luck.
Candidate: Yes I have a real problem, I need a job – can you help?
Recruiter: Some people think I can solve them, Lord Heavens above.
Candidate: So you can’t get me an interview?
Recruiter: No, I'm only human after all. Don't put the blame on me.
6. Girls Just Want To Have Fun - Cyndi Lauper
Recruiter: Why didn’t you attend your interview?
Candidate: I come home in the morning light.
Recruiter: … Okay and why did you do that when you knew you had an interview today?
Candidate: Girls, they wanna have fun.
Recruiter: …
7. Rockstar - Nickleback
Recruiter: So, why are you leaving your role of 15 years?
Candidate: This life hasn't turned out quite the way I want it to be.
Recruiter: Okay, tell me what you want
Candidate: I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs and a bathroom I can play baseball in…
Recruiter: Yeah, 'cause we all just wanna be big rockstars,' but back to reality...
8. It Wasn't Me - Shaggy
Recruiter: I heard the interview didn’t go to plan…
Candidate: It wasn’t me.
Recruiter: You couldn’t answer most of the questions…
Candidate: It wasn’t me.
Recruiter: …Apparently you just walked out.
Candidate: It wasn’t me.
9. Stand By Me - Ben E King
Candidate: The company have asked me to inform you that another agency had already provided them with my CV before you.
Recruiter: Darlin’, darlin’ – stand by me.
Candidate: Sorry – I’m going to let them represent me out of courtesy.
Recruiter: I won’t shed a tear, just as long as you stand by me.
Candidate: Um… No. Bye.
10. Something Stupid - Robbie Williams/Nicole Kidman
Recruiter: So how was the interview?
Candidate: It was going brilliantly…
Recruiter: Going?
Candidate: Yeah, and then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like…
Recruiter: Like…?
Candidate: I got arrested once.
11. Build Me Up Buttercup - The Foundations
Recruiter: Hi! I’ve been trying to get hold of you, are you still okay for today?
Candidate: I can’t attend the interview today, can we re-arrange?
Recruiter: Why do you build me up buttercup, baby just to let me down? And mess me around!
Candidate: Is that a no…?
Recruiter: And worst of all! You never call baby, when you say you will…
12. I Need a Hero - Bonnie Tyler
Recruiter reading client spec: He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight.
Candidate: I don’t know if this job is particularly suitable.
Recruiter: Please! Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need…
Candidate: Okay, maybe… What else were they expecting sorry?
Recruiter reading client spec: He's gotta be sure and it's gotta be soon and he's gotta be larger than life.
Candidate: Yeah… I’m not sure that person exists.
