Coburg Banks | Multi-sector UK recruitment agency

10 Of The Worst Job Adverts You’ll Ever See

By James Ball | May 14, 2015 | Friday Funnies

Would you apply to them?

sign saying 'now hiring - must have a clue"There’s an art to creating a job ad  that compels, excites and inspires the right candidates at the right time.

Unfortunately, some employers haven’t quite got the hang of it yet.

Check out 10 of the worst job ads ever released to the public.

I’d love to be a fly on the wall during the interview stages!

1. There’s no such thing as bad publicity…

Job ad with phrasisn like "if you'd like to work for a company run by a fat bloke"London PR firm, “Just In Time” advertised an account manager position offering people a chance to work for “a fat bloke with a drink problem and a moral compass that only ever points South.”

The rest of the ad calls for an individual on antidepressants, who doesn’t care about global warming and is one drink away from oblivion.

Of course it was all a joke, but it gained a lot of publicity for the firm and an awful lot of replies from willing candidates!

2. I’m lovin’ it!

Picture of McDonalds sign saying 'now hiring losers'

Fast food chains are notoriously unpopular places to work, and have gained a fairly bad reputation for some of their more ‘quirky’ employees (see our last blog – number 4).

But although working at McDonald’s may not be everyone’s dream career, a recent job ad set up by comedic workers, was perhaps a little too harsh.

It certainly doesn’t beat around the bush.

3. “The worst job in PR.”

Working as Head of Communications for a major airline should be the dream ticket.

But Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary has a habit of putting his foot in his mouth and the company freely advertised the position as the ‘worst job in Irish PR’.

The ad set out the need for a ‘brave soul’ to take on the ‘high profile and incredibly overpaid position’ when the outgoing jobholder left for calmer waters (Irish rugby!)

4. Wanted: Masters in “Shutting your Mouth!”

Worst job advert: Apply today! Now open=Pizza Cook Qualifications: Not be a cry bag, masters in S.Y.M 'shutting your mouth', able to read your schedule...This anonymous entry clearly reflects the potential employer’s relationship with the previous jobholder.

You do have to wonder if advertising the fact that the last ‘pizza cook’ cried every day is the right way to attract new staff to the position.

 5. A little too 50 Shades of Grey!

The Dalkey Archive Press posted an ad in 2012, aimed at a variety of different roles…

“…listed in order of importance, but with all initially being equal to one another and in the order that have the most promise for long-term employment.”

The job ad goes on to welcome a certain kind of candidate.  One who doesn’t have…

“…any other commitments (personal or professional)” including but not limited to “family obligations, writing, involvement with other organizations, degrees to be finished, holidays to be taken, weddings to attend in Rio, etc.”

But it doesn’t end there.

Dalkey Archive Press Job Ad SectionClick here to read the entire damning advert!

6. Keeping it casual!

Like any 2-sided relationship, during the recruitment process both sides should take things slowly and try not to seem too keen (even if inside you’re dying to get the job or hire the candidate!)

Desperation really doesn’t suit anyone!

Sign saying - now hiring now right now we're hiring now

I think they might be hiring!

Recruiter Pro Tip

Don’t look too eager when you’re interviewing or being interviewed.

Giving away your desperation means that they have the power!

Keep your cards close to your chest until it’s time to make a decision.

7. Do you have a ‘high level of self importance?’

Then you might be right for the following role.

This job ad, genuinely posted on sounds much more like a troubled employee’s tirade, than an actual bid to find new staff.

Job ad repeatedly calling clients 'twats' and asking for a sales advisor with a high level of self importance The shocking things is that eight people actually applied for this role!

I’m pretty sure I would never want to meet one of those people.

8. Apply now for the ride of your life!

Tech companies are notoriously eccentric with their job adverts and will often post regular vacancies but with weird and wonderful names like ‘marketing wizard,’ (copywriter) ‘dynamic dynamo’ (digital marketing executive) and  ‘digital overlord’ (website manager). (You can check out 50 of the best here).

But there’s a fine line between fun eccentricity and coming across as downright arrogant and offensive.

job ad: asking for people who're 'totally gay for code' and offering to make 'it rain on them hoes'Offering the chance to ‘make it rain on them hoes’ as well as expecting candidates to be ‘totally gay for code’ – Sportacam crossed that line.

9. A Suspicious Surgeon

Surgeon wanted: for a new health clinic opening in the area. No experience needed. Must have own tools. Would you trust a surgeon who had no experience?

This fairly sinister newspaper job ad just doesn’t seem quite right…

In fact honestly, the entire thing conjures up images of some kind of horror movie, involving a rogue surgeon, setting the world to right!

Surely there’s more to hiring a good surgeon than the fact that they own their own tools!

10. Oh Happy Day!

If I’m honest, this is one of my all-time favourite recruitment advert (for all of the wrong reasons!)

In 2001, Ernst and Young released this video, encouraging people to join their team.

I don’t know whether to cringe, laugh or cry!


Honestly, who knows whether these job adverts were merely cleverly put together PR stunts, or miscalculated efforts to stand out in the competitive job market.

One thing is for certain, each of them have caught the public eye, for all of the wrong reasons!

Recruiter Pro Tip

Don’t try to be too clever with your job advert.

Aside from the fact that ultra-edgy content could potentially be putting great candidates off, strange job titles are actually not as easy to search for.

A candidate might not make the link between ‘marketing executive’ and ‘dynamic dynamo’.

Perhaps the most shocking thing about these job adverts is the fact that people actually did apply to them (but in most cases, that’s probably more worrying than not).

Happy Friday!

PS. If you liked this blog, check out our recent post on the 10 strangest jobs you’ll ever read about, you’ll be surprised how many weird and wonderful jobs are out there!

- James Ball

James Ball

James is the founder and owner of Coburg Banks and a recruitment expert from Sutton Coldfield in the UK.  He regularly advises companies on how to improve and get the maximum ROI from their recruitment processes.

> More blog posts by James Ball

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